Your Light

Tonight out of pure honesty and blind stupidity, it was revealed to "him" of my life imperfections...

That my sex life with my hubby is next to none. Once every blue moon; minus the kisses, hugs and the caresses.

That we slept separately; me on the couch and hubby somewhere else. Because I prefer to sleep alone; without the snores, the smell and the touch.

The truth is I don't love my husband anymore.

The truth is come day and night, "he" is constantly in my mind. Someone I would always prefer to do things with; to spend time with; even if it means just laying next to him, doing absolutely nothing.

But I know at the back of my head, we could never be together.

Because our affair is frowned upon; the sweetest taboo.

Even if someday I were to separate from my hubby, marriage is something I would never do again. It is too complicated, too sad, too full of drama, too much of hard work.

And because I am not "his" soul mate; I am replaceable.

Give me a loaded gun and I'll shot my soul out of its confusions and lunacy...