Pride & Prejudice

Today I learnt a valuable lesson on pride, my pride, my self-worth.

That no matter how you adore that somebody - your pride you should never throw. Because if you do that, that nothing will be left of you, except shame. And self-pity.

So today, 30th Sept 2006, exactly 30 days before my 29th birthday, I have decided to stop my fancy towards "that" colleague. Because admiration towards him is just ripping my heart apart, not to mention putting my self-value at the bottom of his shoes.

I am not that.

So, no more peeking at what he's wearing today. No more admiring the way he put his words together or the way he talks to others that makes others bend towards him.

No more of those. Because I'm sick of being nobody's best. Tired for admiring somebody just for some little attention in return. But never getting any.

So, farewell fantasies and illusions. I am my favourite person, so the heck with him or others.

If I am not loved today, maybe tomorrow there's hope.

Even if there isn't any, my self-worth is all I need to pack-up and leave...